This past weekend, I attended my niece’s bridal shower. It was like no shower I had ever attended! There was a beautiful “flower bar,” gorgeous decorations, and delicious food.
But there was also an unspoken reality that everyone was aware of.
You see, my little five-year-old nephew is in the final days of his battle with brain cancer. His family has watched him take a turn and decline rapidly over the past two weeks. His aunt—the bride’s aunt—has been at the center of caring for him, hardly leaving his side. And now, in the midst of it all, she was hosting a bridal shower.
I know her heart was for this day to be a time of complete joy and celebration. She did not want the heart-wrenching pain unfolding back at her home to overshadow this special occasion.
As I pondered the situation, I was struck by the reality that, of course, this is a happy time. It is the beginning of a new family. There is excitement and anticipation. New love is a sweet and beautiful thing.
And yet, isn’t life really a mixture of pain and smiles, joy and tears, defeat and victory?
Perhaps there is no better preparation for marriage.
As I watch my sister-in-law cling to Jesus during this incredibly difficult time, I am blessed. I am encouraged in my own faith as I walk alongside her through the darkness and pain.
God. Uses. Everything.
The message that every new bride needs is the hope we have in the gospel. Our identity in Christ and the assurance of His sovereign care over both the good and the bad times are the lifelines every new marriage needs.
I am reminded of my precious friend, Nancie. I miss her dearly.
All three of her children were married within the span of one year. Then, just before her youngest child’s wedding, Nancie was diagnosed with inoperable, terminal brain cancer. It was a bittersweet time, to say the least.
She was able to attend all three weddings and meet her first grandchild before peacefully walking into the arms of Jesus on September 22, 2018.
Before her diagnosis, she gave a blessing at her second child’s wedding reception. I want to close with her words. I hope they bless you as much as they have blessed me:
“I know that today you will receive many blessings and best wishes for all those wonderful things that we all want to experience—health and happiness and children. Things that we expect out of life that are wonderful.
But my prayer for you is that God will shatter some of those good dreams so that He can give you the best dream of knowing Him in a deep, abiding, intimate way. So that you would know Him—the God who knows you, who made you, and who loves you.
He wants to have an intimate relationship with you, individually and together.
So, to this end, we also pray that our God would count you worthy of your calling and fulfill every desire for goodness and every work of faith with power, so that the name of our Lord Jesus will be glorified in you, and you in Him, according to the grace of the Lord Jesus.”
Maybe this is the truest blessing we can give a bride and groom—not that they will have a life without pain, but that through every joy and every sorrow, they will know Jesus more deeply.
Because sometimes God allows our good dreams to be shattered so that we can discover something infinitely better: Him.
